Author: Felicia

The Climb

Posted on by Felicia

Disclaimer: This will be a longer post than usual. Ready? Ok.

My boyfriend (we’ll call him C for the sake of the post) is an avid rock climber. He’s lead certified and all. During his birthday weekend, he took me to his favorite rock gym.

I’ve rock climbed a few times before, but I’ve never seen walls so HIGH. I mean, they were at least 10 stories. As one of the staff walked me through a quick training, I kept glancing up at those monstrosities wondering if I would ever be able to fully scale them.

Flash forward a few minutes later to my first climb, using an auto-belay. C was watching me from a bench not too far away. I started climbing only to realize three stories up that I hadn’t practiced the fall. I. Was. Scared. Quickly looking to C, he casually and confidently assured me that it was perfectly okay to let go and that the auto-belay would catch me and bring me down. I wasn’t trying to hear it. Me, the beginner climber was arguing with someone far more wise and knowing.

A group of climbers came around the corner and one yelled up to me and said, “I know it’s scary, but it’ll be okay. I promise.” The added encouragement is what I needed to let go and get planted back on the ground.

But two things happened here:

1. I chose to listen to a voice of a stranger. I was literally hanging on the word of someone I’ll never see again. My man was right there though, looking up and watching my every move from the very beginning. I was always safe. Yet I didn’t follow his direction and support.

2. I extended my trial by not trusting the voice of the one I knew, loved and trusted. C would never put me in harm’s way. But my fear clouded my faith. What I thought I knew in all of my inexperience held more weight.

How many times have we looked to friends, family and mentors during challenges instead of shifting immediately to our Creator? Or once we did look to our Creator, we questioned and argued our way through it?

That rock climb put a lot of things into perspective. Before we left, I climbed that particular wall again and made it about seven stories before my arms started burning (definitely out of shape). I also successfully bouldered a path with C’s watchful guidance. No harness, no lines. I climbed with a firm trust that he wouldn’t bring me harm and the results were far more rewarding than I could have imagined.

O, to live assuredly.

O, to live consistently

Posted on by Felicia

It has been over two years since I last wrote a piece and I apologize. The point of this page was to share my journey with you, the readers—my digital family, if you will—and all you’ve received is the proverbial radio silence.

I wasn’t being very consistent across most areas of my life and this blog was no exception.

What does it mean to be consistent? Webster’s Dictionary will tell you “unchanging in nature, standard, or effect over time.”

As Christians, we know consistency through God, yeah? Through his steadfast and overwhelming love, continual forgiveness and…well, everything. My favorite name for God is Yahweh, which means “I Am” in Hebrew. Because it shows that He is here. He is now. Yesterday, tomorrow. The Great I Am is always.

It took me awhile to snap back and get into the swing of things. To reignite my passions, to get reacquainted with parts of myself that I had forgotten. Most importantly, my pursuit of God has regained its consistency–something that should have never waxed cold to begin with.

I’m dusting off this site and thanks for your support, fam. I back.

The Set Place

Posted on by Felicia

While we waited for service to start today at church, two of my friends and I were squeezed into two seats because we forgot to save the right number. A was going to get up and move because she didn’t want us to be uncomfortable. Myself and E were trying to convince her to stay–why should she move if this was where we all wanted to sit? In the midst of our little quibble, the chairs next to us opened up. We praised God for the good fortune and spread out.

I leaned over to A and joked, “This is what happens when you stay in your set place; God will move everything around you when you stay where you’re supposed to.”

As I sat back in my seat, I realized those words rung true. In my lightheartedness, I was reminded of God’s faithfulness. When you are obedient and choose to prosper where you’re planted…when you go where He wants you to go, He will move heaven and earth on your behalf. Situations can change. Jobs will open up, raises will be afforded to you, favor will go before you. I truly believe that.

Just be mindful that it may not happen in your timeline. If A had gotten up when she wanted to, she wouldn’t have been in the position to get that spot. We suffered temporary discomfort for second row seats to an amazing service. Synonyms for the word set are “settle” and “plant.” That implies a period of waiting, staying, and growing.

Recognize your set place…and don’t move for anything.

A Different View

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Amidst the aftermath of Trump’s immigration ban and its subsequent chatter uproar, my friends and I made the decision to walk in someone else’s shoes on World Hijab Day. Wearing a hijab was different and in my naïveté, I wasn’t expecting how much. The looks of curiosity, the stares and the hints of interest were what took me aback. I felt a bit removed, as if I didn’t quite belong. When in class amongst students who knew me, I didn’t think much of the change. But when it came time to greet seas of unfamiliar faces, that’s when I felt dissimilar.

I was on display…in a way I was personally unfamiliar with. And it was okay because I would take the hijab off at the end of the day and return it to its rightful owner. But what about the women who wear it daily? What about the women who deal with the stares and inquisition while holding their heads proudly?

As a black woman in America, I think it’s safe to say I share in the unique life experiences (and struggles) that accompany those of my sex and/or race. There is so much to be said about race relations in the US and my own personal experiences, but that’s not what this post is for.When my friends and I wore hijab that day, Muslim friends and classmates were touched by the simple action and some, reduced to tears. We didn’t realize it would matter so much. We merely wanted to walk alongside, even if only for a few hours.

We as a society all have our own personal strife and issues that we have to deal with. It’s life. But I wish we looked to our neighbors, co-workers and friends more. To stand. To show love. To support.

O, to live unitedly.

Dear United States,

Posted on by Felicia

“Utterly hopeful in Jesus.”

This encapsulates everything I wished to say so beautifully. In lieu of my monthly post, I hope this resonates with you as it did with me.

Mike Patz

I love you. (I love us.)

I thank God for our nation and our liberties and our diversity and our exceptional approach.  Jon Stewart is right: “This ain’t easy … America is not natural. Natural is tribal. We are fighting against thousands of years of human behavior and history to create something that no one’s ever done. That’s what’s exceptional …”

Which is why I plead with us to consider these four words: Fear not. Forget not.

Fear not.

Do not live in fear.

Do not lead from fear.

Do not look at people through the lens of fear.

Let’s be a land of the free and a home of the brave. Especially to any American who follows Jesus, I remind us that our way is not the way of fear. Our path is not the path of paranoia. I do not suggest that we abandon wisdom, but we are commanded to be anxious for nothing.

My…

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O, to live confidently

Posted on by Felicia

My aunt has a Pomeranian. His name is Taz. This dog loves to eat human food. I’m in the Lone Star State for the holidays and have witnessed his recent rewards for patiently waiting: boiled eggs, pancake medallions, candied bacon pieces, chicken. In addition to the typical doggie diet, Taz eats well. 

The other day, I was eating a cookie oreo brownie on the couch. And where was Taz? Right by my feet, hoping I would drop a morsel his way or treat him to some of the gooey goodness altogether. If you know anything about dogs, chocolate can make them terribly sick. Knowing that, I wasn’t going to give him something that would harm him; even if he wanted it.

I sat there in my humanness thinking about how often I had waited patiently for something I wanted, praying expectantly to God believing He’d give it to me simply because I asked. But that’s not how life always works, now is it?

No good thing will God withhold from those who walk upright (Psalm 84:11). He withholds no good thing. Sometimes we don’t get what we want when we want it because it’s not good for us. In fact, some of our desires can bring harm. And knowing this, God looks down at our expectant, hopeful faces with outstretched arms and gives a gentle “No.”

I don’t always understand why some things don’t work out the way I hope. That’s perfectly alright. It takes simple trust that God knows best. I’ll get my good thing and it’ll be without heartache or sickness.

 

A seat at the table

Posted on by Felicia

Based on the response, this previously unfinished post has been resurrected and completed. Enjoy.

Sometimes you have to choose yourself. And it’s ok. Not everyone is going to deserve all of you. Some take more from the table than they bring.

Don’t let yourself get depleted. 

Don’t find yourself thirsting for emotional support, prayer and real friendship because people entered your life, saw what you could provide–what you could feed them–and took what they needed while leaving you hungry. 

Your life is a dinner table. Sometimes it will be overflowing with wisdom, peace, encouragement and support. Other times you may be missing a dish or three and need the people in your life to bring what you lack. Your table should never be empty, because God is willing and able to supply all of your needs.

But we were never made to eat alone. That’s why you never see tables designed for 1 person. Real relationships blossom and grow when all parties involved prepare and give their best. 

Be mindful of who you allow to sit at your table. 

Author’s Aside: There will be people who enter your life for the sole purpose of receiving. You won’t feel drained or emptied when they leave. There will also be those who enter your life for the sole purpose of giving. You’ll walk away feeling emotionally and/or spiritually full. 

O, to live wealthily

Posted on by Felicia

On our campus, there are three commuter lots for graduate/professional students who drive. A parking decal must be purchased and placed in the lower right side of the front window to prevent being ticketed. Students are usually reminded to purchase their decals for the new academic year a few weeks prior to the fall semester’s commencement.

I was asking my friend after class during the second week if he was walking to the commuter lot. He had proclaimed that he still hadn’t gotten his parking decal in the mail and was subsequently paying $10 per day in a nearby garage.

I was shocked. “Why are you paying for parking when you could be using your temporary decal?!” At this point, we were walking out and he froze at my question. “There’s a temporary parking decal?!” I proceeded to show him how to access it so he wouldn’t have to pay for parking the next day. Come to find out, it covered him for almost a month.

He ended up paying $120 before learning about the temporary decal. The yearly parking pass was $160. Because he didn’t understand what the decal entailed, my friend payed a price he didn’t need to.

As I walked to my car, God reminded me that so many of His children try to “pay” or earn for things that are already part of our accepting and living for Him.

Sometimes the things we need and seek are linked solely to our relationship with Christ. How often in life do we try to earn peace, earn love, earn grace, earn salvation, earn healing? The price was already paid when Christ died on a wooden cross. When you’re a child of the Most High God and have accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, there is a wealth of opportunity and blessings that come with it. There are things we have a right to simply because of the kinship.

Christ’s sacrifice was priceless….and thank God for it. We are heirs. Can you imagine the cost if we had to pay for some of our blessings and opportunities ourselves?!

Sheesh.